The paid one
The First Ten Seconds
A quiet guide to the fear of blushing.
The First Ten Seconds is a guide about the seconds before the blush, which is where the fear actually lives.
- Forty nine pages, as a PDF.
- Five parts, then a plan of thirty days with one small step a day.
- Every piece of research it leans on is listed at the back with a link, so you can read the study rather than take my word for it.
The First Ten Seconds
Forty nine pages, as a PDF. Instant download.
22,99 euro, including VAT. One payment, no subscription. Fourteen days to change your mind.
Not on sale yet. It goes to the email list first, and the list is free.
One short email a week. Leave with one click.
Who it is for.
- You already know the blush is not the real problem and you want the work laid out in order.
- You want to do it by yourself, at your own pace, without sitting in a waiting room.
- You want the reasoning and the sources, not somebody's confidence.
Who it is not for.
- You want it gone by Friday. It will not be, and I would rather say so before you pay.
- You are looking for a verdict on surgery or on medication. That is a doctor's job and this guide does not do it.
- Blushing is one part of something heavier you are carrying. Then a person, not a document, is the right next step.
What is inside.
- 1
What is actually happening when you blush
The physiology in plain words: what your body is doing to your face and why you cannot instruct it to stop. Then the loop, which is the part nobody explains. Fear of blushing produces the conditions for blushing, and noticing that you are blushing feeds it. Once you can see the loop you can stop fighting the wrong end of it.
- 2
Where the fear lives
Not in the blush. In the seconds before, when you are running a simulation of how you are about to be seen. This part covers the spotlight effect, the finding that people consistently overestimate how much others register about them, and what that means when you are the one who is red.
- 3
Where your attention goes
Task concentration training, in plain language and as an exercise you can actually do. This is the approach studied for fear of blushing by Bögels and colleagues, and it is the reason this guide exists rather than another breathing exercise. Attention is the one part of this that is trainable.
- 4
Exposure that fits a real life
A ladder you build yourself, from something small enough to be boring up to the thing you have been avoiding for years. No public speaking on day one. The rungs are yours, because only you know which ordinary moment is the hard one.
- 5
The days it comes back
It will come back. A bad week, a new job, a room full of people you want to impress. This part is about what that means and what it does not mean, and about the difference between a setback and a return to the start. Consistency beats intensity, and the plan is built for the days you skip.
Then a plan of thirty days
One small thing a day, in the same rhythm as the daily videos. Most days take under five minutes. Some days say rest, and they mean it. The plan is designed for the days you skip, because you will skip days.
The last pages are the sources. Every study named in the guide is there with its authors, its year and a link, so nothing in it has to be taken on trust.
What it is not.
Not therapy, and not medical advice.
- Not therapy. Not a substitute for therapy.
- Not a cure. That word does not belong here.
- Not medical advice. Nothing in it tells you what to take.
- Not advice about surgery. It gives you the published numbers and then it stops.
What other people say.
Nothing yet. The guide is new and I am not going to write reviews for it. When there are real ones, from people who bought it and finished it, they will be here with their own words and nothing added.
Questions about the guide.
- What exactly do I get.
- A PDF of forty nine pages with five written parts and a plan of thirty days. It arrives by email from the payment provider straight after you pay. It reads on a phone, and you can print it.
- How long does it take.
- You could read the five parts in an evening. The plan is thirty days, because the plan is the part that does the work and it needs the days.
- Is it a subscription.
- No. One payment, one time. There is nothing to cancel.
- How do I get my money back.
- Reply to the receipt within 14 days and say the word refund. You do not have to give a reason and I will not ask for one.
- Do I need the free emails first.
- No. They overlap at the start and then the guide goes further. If you are unsure, start with the emails, they cost nothing.
- Will my name be on anything.
- No. Nothing is public, nothing is shared, there is no forum and no comment section. Your email address is used to send you the file and the receipt.
The videos this comes from are on YouTube, a new one every day.
Subscribe on YouTubeThe First Ten Seconds
Forty nine pages, as a PDF. Instant download.
22,99 euro, including VAT. One payment, no subscription. Fourteen days to change your mind.
Not on sale yet. It goes to the email list first, and the list is free.
One short email a week. Leave with one click.